Parents face the conundrum of dealing with sudden perplexing changes in a very young child’s emotional state and personality when that child does not possess developed articulation skills to state who, what, when where, what has happened to explain alterations from a happy, gurgling baby to a tense, sporadically hysterical or irritable baby.
Something has happened, yet what that is is a matter for investigation and not simply speculation, because whatever it is, it is seriously impacting the child’s mood, personality, development, or even survival. Symptoms may be subtle, sporadic, isolated to certain circumstances such as bathing and diaper changing, or anything involved with dressing and undressing.
An abused animal will display symptoms of unusual intimidation and fear; such symptoms also appear in young children among adults who have subjected them to abuse.
Abusers are bullies and cowards who pick on vulnerable subjects but who also enjoy the act of sneak attacks in plain sight upon vulnerable subjects who are unable to protect themselves or fight back. Trusted caretakers and relatives who are abusers are the most dangerous predators to children as they are allowed to repeat their assaults in real time and space as they have access to private spaces within the household.
Close observation of genital pain, infections, rashes especially if repetitious, should be checked with DNA sampling, and those present within time proximity to the surfacing of pain or noted genital discomfort should be the subject of close attention.
Parents should not be shy of questioning children about any upset or distress, sudden mood alterations, pressing for more detail. Young children who suddenly display acute distress around diaper changes or toileting must be questioned carefully.
Young children can be penetrated without being torn, though their openings are painfully stretched, and abusers know how to handle their baby subjects like little footballs to be cupped and manipulated for best digital or penile penetration.
When questioned, though initially reticent, children will want to be relieved of the burden of their secrets. Patience in questioning and lack of emotional distress at answers is critical to getting information. The feared and forbidden myth of leading questions and directing information or the famed coaching accusation popularized by the work of psychologist Stephen Cece PhD, whose structured lab work developed the protocols for leading questions and coaching, poisoned the literature on proper techniques for helping children describe what happened to them.
There is no great mystery about assisting children to have the words that describe what they know and can identify very simply and clearly what happened to them in their own words. The greatest difficulty has to do with adults not taking time to precisely examine the child’s use of words, baby words, idiosyncratic use of words in the family, instead of correct anatomical terms.
Audio and video taping the exchange is invaluable to the process of reporting and protecting the child. The most frequent perpetrators of harm in the form of incest or sexual abuse is related to first degree relatives with the greatest access to the child.
There is no mystery or ignorance as to the genital sexual abuse of young children, only a lack of appetite to take on very difficult and controversial accusations. The discomfort associated with examining controversial, complex issues is exactly what perpetrators of crimes against little children count on from their well socialized adult counterparts – the embarrassment of law-abiding citizens contrasted with the shame and sensitivity of investigators.
In the current court atmosphere of perverse transfer of children into the custody of abusers, discussion of the culture of avarice, perversion and criminality is reserved for a separate discussion.
A recent case in point before the FCVFC involves the case of a five year old girl who has undergone the first five years of her life under what the experts of the FCVFC have evaluated, diagnosed and assessed to be court-ordered joint custody and demands for coparenting where one parent has been clearly and thoroughly documented to be an obsessed abuser. Sexual assault occurred, was captured in forensic evaluation and document review, accompanied by the aggressive attack on the protective parent and assault on the credibility of the child.
When children perfectly relate the experience of assault, identify by time, date and place all aspects of what occurred, as well as the fact that the child was photographed in a manner that makes it clear that the photos are not only pornographic but clearly suggest a market for the pictures, they are attacked for the quality of their disclosures as having been “coached.”
The response of the family court officials on this criminal reporting was to seek punitive action against the Protective Parent and the child and to declare the accused perpetrator a victim of unfair accusations by the child and all who took actions to protect the child.
The response to the unconscionable attack on those who sought to correctly protect the child and take all necessary steps to prosecute the perpetrator of crimes against the child, her mother and extended family, is in part stated in this response to the GAL, whose role as an officer of the court is to collect information to present to the Trier of Fact, the judge.
Instead of any constructive interaction, all officers of the court aligned to trample on the evidence, seeking to block all evidence of assault or information about pornographic material production.
Last, absurdly, the court sought to keep the child from any treatment that would facilitate clarity or therapeutic intervention.
The FCVFC staff defeated those efforts with Appeal filings, Criminal Sexual Assault filings, removal of the judge and GAL from their positions for facilitating child endangerment and abuse.
A letter to the GAL in response to her vicious, idiotic attacks, threats and attempts at intimidation on the child’s mother, references our thoughts on the GAL.
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To the Guardian ad Litem:
I have been reviewing the correspondence generated by you and have come to the conclusion that your ignorance clearly outstrips your arrogance and pomposity when it comes to failure to protect children and my child specifically.
As a result of the failures and interference of this court, my child has endured years of terror, humiliation, and assault because you either are as ignorant and stupid as you appear to be or as callous and indifferent to the suffering of my child as is evident through your current flow of coercive correspondence.
By comparison to the hostile tone directed toward me, your endless support for my child’s named abuser, your biased, brutal support for his continued assaults on her body and her sense of self stand in opposition to your role as a fact gatherer and child representative.
The lack of protection for the child speaks of a level of deranged cruelty on your part and ignorance of laws related to child abuse, neglect and endangerment.
In my personal and professional opinion you are a danger to my child as well as to the public welfare, as I am sure there are other victims in your past and present. If the man who has physically and sexually abused and has been allowed to continue over the years to abuse my daughter, who seeks to exploit her as a sexual object in photography, was a neighbor or a random intruder he would have been hunted down, surrounded by armed police and brought to jail.
Instead you get to exploit my vulnerability, fearfulness of your vaunted authority and the vulnerability of my child before a court that is as cruel, vindictive and lawless as are you.
The experts that are engaged by me are world renowned, published authors and court experts who have done their work and are in possession of all medical, legal, and forensic records. They already have a clear and present picture of the danger my child faces, has faced and will suffer from for decades directly as a result of your presence in this case as appointed by a judge who may in fact be as irresponsible and reckless as you.
You and this court will not be left standing to impose your venal, draconian orders, as you will be subject to the actions of legal authorities that will immediately be holding you responsible for threats, coercion, witness tampering and endangering the life of a child, causing suffering to all who love her.
I will see you in court, and you can respond in writing to the legal documents filing complaints against you and all court authorities who oversee your licenses.
I suggest that you place your malpractice on notice for fully overstepping the boundaries of your immunity, your authority, and encroaching on the violations of my and my family’s due process rights to protect ourselves and my child. We will be addressing past malevolence and facing the future risks you so threateningly seek to impose.
I will not be responding to your threats and attempts at intimidation by yielding to directives that harm my daughter. Your writings, your invective will be turned over to legal authorities that know how to deal with vicious, lawless bullies who are ignorant of the law, callous as to respect for human life and feign ignorance or alter factual, scholarly knowledge related to child forensic evaluation and abuse reporting when it comes to identifying child abuse and the consequences of such venal actions as have been perpetrated against my child, myself and my family.
Signed,
[Protective Parent]
