The FCVFC blog focuses on analyzing, confronting, and remediating corruption across the country in the family, juvenile, and dependency courts.
But behind the scenes much of our work has to do with helping to determine optimal custody decisions, as fair as possible in the interest of all parties.
So what defines an “optimal custody decision” in the miserable, inexact process of custody litigation?
First, is one parent a criminal?
In the case of one parent having exacted crimes against a child, such as sexual crimes, then the fairest decision for all involved is for that parent to be completely removed from the child’s life and for the child to be raised by the protective parent.
If not, what will we look for?
But not all custody litigants are either, on the one hand, criminals who engage in heinous crimes against children, or, on the other hand, protectors trying to guard their children against those heinous crimes.
Not all opposing litigants seek revenge on their spouses, cover from criminal charges, or a complete financial advantage.
Some spouses have engaged in bad acts and have made bad decisions, and some have faced very serious consequences in their lives, relationships, and marriages. But they still love their children, want the best for them, and are not a danger to them.
And their children clearly show love for these parents and want to be with them.
Should these people lose their children and become another family court tragedy?
No.
At the FCVFC, we have a protocol for helping couples who seek peaceful alternatives to high-conflict custody litigation. We work with parents who have irreparably destroyed their marital relationship, but who still deeply love their children.
We look for signs of remorse on the part of the offending person, not engaging in “yes but” behavior. We look for a true desire to work on the issues raised in the intimate secrets beyond the divorce complaint.
Most of all, we look for deep, profound love for the child and love returned by the child.
How the FCVFC can help
The work we do involves a complex, long-term engagement in family and individual treatment for all members, development of creative plans for parent-child contact with physical and emotional safety, and absolute confidentiality for all family members who work with a treatment team.
Staff of the FCVFC have gone to court with these parents to defend them, to explain the origins of their afflictions, and to outline a course of managing relationships for the benefit of all.
At the FCVFC we reject the capricious and autocratic demands made by the family court system, which abandons reason, morality, and empathy in favor of money and power.
Instead, we depend on open communication, mutual respect, reflective analytic understanding, and working confidentially within a context of long-term treatment.
You want a family court decision that will be fair
In this emotional process you need an experienced third party who can guide you. The FCVFC will keep your children’s best interest at heart and will help you map out a custody plan that will be as fair as possible to all.
