“Reunification therapy” is a harmful practice based on the harmful pseudo-diagnosis of “parental alienation” in the family court system.
“Reunification therapy,” as per the fundamental working model, is a process that is geared to alter the child’s reality testing and perception of abuse. The denial of the child’s own experience of actions directed at them and acted upon them by a physically, sexually, and emotionally acting-out abusive parent is redefined by the reunification so-called therapist as a false perception, a miscommunication, a misunderstanding, ideas planted in the child’s head by the other parent.
This so-called “miscommunication” process is rendered as another aspect of the “corrective” treatment process via reunification involving the re-education of the parent who is defined as the “alienator/coacher.”
When our clients engage in clinical workups and diagnostic processes in working with the expert forensic team of the Foundation, we seek to understand on an intensive and detailed level exactly who has said what to whom, what has been done by whom and when, and how each individual understood, experience, perceived, and felt about, the events that unfolded over periods of time.
Assessment, diagnostic understanding, and preservation of evidence for litigation, as well as treatment are undertaken over a period of time and supplemented with medical, educational, and legal documents.
This is not a “spit in the wind” process in which a one-size program that fits all is implemented to fit a family court process driven by financial greed and gain, beginning with driving child support funds to the state through federal government programs.
The incentives for child support are, in our experience and as per our case-by-case review, a prime financial motive that drives fees to state programs and from state programs to support the judicial process and court approved and appointed collaborators.
The reunification mind control process, in our experience and as documented through our clients, is equivalent to the processes engaged in by China in dealing with their Uighur Muslim population as well as other oppressive autocratic societies such as North Korea, with regard to population control.
If one looks at the increase in drug abuse, murders, suicides, gun violence, domestic violence, and mental illness in our society over the past 50 years, look to the family court system, which no one seems to be talking about with regard to the malevolent, psychopathic, greed-driven transfer of children from the custody of protective parents into the hands of clinically and criminally verifiably culpable dangerous abusive individuals.
Here are some emails I received from a person who is involved with the “reunification therapy” system in New England. And my response.
My comments on the emails from the other party are in [bold brackets].
Email #1
Reunification therapy is not your problem. In fact, it is a godsend to the children who have gone through it. The ones you are talking about are the ones where the other parent impeded with the reunification constantly with all of the therapists and are now pissed off that the courts have had to order intensive. The courts do not order this UNLESS they have serious grounds to do so as it is extremely expensive. But done properly, takes only a few days to debunk the false memories and allegations being logged and to bring some closure and healing to the children who are caught in the parents Divorce War.
It is the adversarial process that is the problem. If the courts did not allow adversarial attorneys to run rough shod all over the courts, most of this we not even exist except for true abuse cases. There would be far less false allegations. Allegations of abuse are used to gain control over the other spouse. When more than 60% of the cases of supposed abuse turn out to be false., that is a huge issue. It takes time, money, and resources from the true victims.
Email #2
Have you reviewed the scientific research and studies that were included and all the links and one pagers that are backed by 35 years of research and study? Once you can say you have done that, then you can say you are doing fair reporting. Right now, we still have an issue with people claiming the reunification is not appropriate in custodial interference cases. Please take the time to read and review everything I sent you.
Email #3
Linda Gottlieb is one of the leading experts in reunification with over 25 years working with over 3000 foster children. The one thing every single abused child wanted was to know when they could go home or see their abuser.
[Referencing a research population dealing with foster care children is tantamount to dealing with the Uighur Muslim population in China. There is no more isolated, controlled, manipulated, experimented-upon, cash-cow program than CPS programs across the country, staffed all too frequently with illiterate workers who are tasked with filling out a check-off form of activities supervised by layers of bureaucrats who siphon children through a money-making conveyor belt system. In the experience of the Foundation for Child Victims of the Family Courts, the cases we have seen handled by Child Protective Services, almost without exception, require intensive criminal and civil litigation to expose the lies and malevolent separation of children from parents who in most instances should never have lost custody and sentencing of children into the abyss of having to survive on their own in an environment that is essentially a conveyor belt tantamount to a food processing center. The American foster care system is a travesty in which “kids for cash” does not even begin to examine the depth and breadth of damage done to children who are forced to deal with this situation.]
I know Linda personally. She is very dear to my heart and the things that have been misquoted or twisted are disgusting. Linda would not heart a fly. And her reunification therapy is analogous to what is used for religious type cults or situations like patty Hearst (Stockholm Syndrome). So what you are saying is that no debriefing from cults is allowed because the therapy is the same as the person who needs the religious debriefing has also been alienated from friends and family.
Linda’s program has also been scientifically researched and found to have a 96% success rate which is better than most traditional therapists can even match. Why? Because there has been so much intensive research and study done on the topic. The patterns of behaviors by the aggressive alienator are so repetitive from case to case, that once you get the real facts, it is easy to determine a false case of alienation from a true one.
Linda and I have both gotten false cases of alienation. In one case I had, I told the parent that I could not help them as they were too filled with anger, hatred and rage at the other parent. Linda has had similar situations too. But that is also the difference, we do know the signs and symptoms to look for. Just because someone screams abuse, does not make it so. I always tell my clients never to state this unless they have solid, verifiable evidence to support their claims. That this is not the way to go. Getting proper counseling is what is needed for everyone.
This is where the other sides falls short. They are looking to blame instead of looking for solutions. We all agree that the psychological abuse of custodial interference that uses coercive control and alienation behaviors via domestic violence by proxy, is not okay. So we need to solve for the problem not condemn the different treatment protocols. As I said just because someone is claiming abuse does not mean there was abuse. In this case of Linda’s, the parent was never substantiated for abuse, actually just the reverse. And I am pretty sure that if the parent had been substantiated, Linda would probably not be taking the case because it would not be alienation but estrangement.
And while I cannot talk for Linda, I think it is deplorable that she and other exceptional experts, who have done their due diligence scholastically and base their work on 100 years of alienation history along with 35 specific to parental alienation scientific research, are being targeted for their like-minded belief system that is based entirely on verifiable, solid evidence, research and statistics that have been published in the medical research type journals. [What has been published has been extensively criticized.] Did you know that Meier’s and Mercer cannot even get into one of those because their work is so flawed. Think about that for a minute.
[The case in point involves children subject to the incursions of this individual’s autocratic directives who have deteriorated into acute suicidal and self-destructive functioning. Their overall medical and educational functioning has also deteriorated to a state that is unmistakable related to the forced circumstances imposed by this individual. After the children were removed from this demonstrably toxic environment imposed upon them, forced upon them, forced to engage with a parent who hated them and fought to damage them, the children then described in great detail the experiences of their daily lives. Allowed to live in a healthy untethered environment with their protective parent, the children have again returned to their emotionally healthy state. Unfortunately, we have numerous intensive case studies of this nature that range from the experiences of very very young children through latency, teenage years, and young adults.]
Email #4
By the way, as to the letter one of your clients received. Guess what?! That is part of the protocol for all alienation cases and reunification. The alienating parent must comply with their own Therapuetic treatment. And yes, if they are court ordered to pay, they must pay. This is like any other court order that is given related to therapy. You either comply and do it, or risk the courts being even more made at you.
The only reason these situations get out of control is because the alienating parent is hell bent on making sure, like all the other attempts at therapy, that it does not happen. Even children of abuse need to go to therapy to work through it. But here is the problem. When a child has not been abused but is forced to lie to therapist and anyone the alienator tells them to talk to, imagine the damages to that child’s psyche? The problem again is not the true allegations but the massive amount of false allegations which are gumming it up for true victims.
The only way to resolve this, is through proper training and education to recognize signs and symptoms of false allegations versus true allegations, especially in psychological abuse situations.
[Psychotherapy is meant to be an experience that respects autonomy, privacy, freedom of expression, and never commands a protocol for how people speak to each other, interact, express feelings, or imposes consequences that involve deprivation of rights and punishment. The comment involved in the descriptions of the so-called “alienating parent” and the interventions by the so-called therapists describe a sado-masochistic dynamic of master-slave autocratic engagement. More equivalent to the descriptions sado-masochistic as described in the Marate de Sade compendiums, whose annals chronicled the desired behaviors and interactions involving sado-sasochism.
The so-called therapists of reun services ascribe to an autocratic practice that in the opinion of me is no less tan a prescription for sadistic control by a court-ordered actor who becomes a licensed prison guard.]
My email response to this person
I will respond to your concerns for parents who indeed separate children via pathological processes and force their children into irrational/unwarranted hatred of another parent. In an article I am writing to clarify the terms – the pathology – the treatment that does not involve torture! [This article can now be found here.]
I am completely familiar with the literature, the research, the writers…..but I am most concerned about the victims of a false narrative that is nothing more than trafficking to the highest bidder by serial predators.
The clinical diagnostic terms for such behavior do not include the Gardner model of parental alienation nor does it include the Warshak / Family Bridges model of “reunification therapy” – a field of practice that does not exist.
Email #5
Yes, this field of therapy does exist. It is falls under cult-debriefing.
Next, yes, just like there are false allegations of alienation, there are way more false allegations of abuse. And that is what is gumming up the works for true victims.
I just spent the past couple of weeks helping a women and her children get a restraining order and back into the marital home. Thankfully her ex was willing to do whatever it takes to fix the problem. We will see if he actually does the therapy, the Therapuetic supervised visits and so on. The judge was very happy to hear that they are putting things in place and not just pushing dad out of the picture entirely.
Now if Dad does not follow through and start to turn his social skills around and parenting skills around, then the judge will make the right decision and continue the restraining order which stays in place with Therapuetic Supervised Visitation.
Letter to the Courts from a Nationally Recognized Forensic Expert
One of the experts associated with the Foundation for Child Victims of the Family Courts wrote the following letter to the court, requesting an end to the video calls the alleged abuser continued to have with his child.
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As per my consultations on this case over an extended period of time with prior counsel, it has been my long-standing assessment and direction to counsel that any interaction between this child and her diagnosed psychopathic abuser is an enduring source of harm and irreversible damage to this child. Further, the potential development of a second generation of a psychopathic personality is a considerable risk for the reasons stated below.
A child who must endure the abuses and ravages of a psychopathic parent is learning the techniques of survival in engaging with a self-absorbed predator who seeks to justify his own gratification at the expense of others.
The child is learning to survive, but the predator is an overwhelming presence in her life who is perceived as a “winner in this situation, as he is able to do anything he wants to with the child while experiencing no perceivable consequences.
This child exhibits intelligence and rapid capacity for learning, as multiple accounts regarding her interactions with her father indicate that she is learning how to maneuver and manipulate him. She is also learning how to maneuver and manipulate her mother, as well as other social situations.
Exposure to a predator and being forced to survive in the presence of a predator not only evokes the memories of earlier abuse that occurred before the child had better coping mechanisms but also induces the child to learn better skills and better coping mechanisms that involve the suppression of feeling, empathy, authenticity, and the development skills that deal with socialization, guilt responsibility, and accountability.
These are all values that the child has had to sacrifice because she has not experienced any of these consequences with regard to her own protection. The consequence is a sense of entitlement to connive, lie, cheat, and manipulate in any manner, shape, or form that is required.
The detailed interactions that have been documented by various professionals in each of the
Zoom meetings, from the beginning of the meetings, have been provided to me in great volume and detail. They connote a pattern of maturing coping mechanisms, better mood management, and internal mood regulation that are unnatural, unhealthy, and do not bode well for her future as a well socialized member of society. Every indication at this time is that this child is being taught to be a psychopath at the hands of her physical, sexual, and emotional abuser. In the literature accounts of father and son grooming for shared sexual exploitation and murders are the backdrop of the pathology grounded in this child’s development.
As per my repeated complaints and objections to the continued Zoom meetings and exposure of this child to this diagnosed psychopathic personality, it is with great relief that this opportunity is offered to cease and desist the malevolent, malignant progress toward the growth of a significant personality disorder and the development of a socially dysfunctional human being.
It seriously endangers the minor child’s mental and emotional health and development each day.
The zoom calls must stop right now to attempt to interfere with the destructive process that is already a serious danger to this child’s character development.
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There are ways to keep children safe from abusers, and they involve immediate and aggressive litigation and prosecution of those who advance a false narrative that endangers the lives of children and causes grief and suffering to all who love them.
